


Keep Moving til the Morning Light

by kueble



Category: Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015)
Genre: F/F, F/M, Gen, Honeypot, Sexual Humor, and loves it, friendly bragging, roxy has a filthy mouth, who doesn't love it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-25
Updated: 2015-02-25
Packaged: 2018-03-15 00:52:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3432014
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kueble/pseuds/kueble
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Roxy has a way with the ladies.  And the gentlemen.  And everyone, pretty much.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Keep Moving til the Morning Light

**Author's Note:**

> For [this prompt](http://dressing-room3.livejournal.com/405.html?thread=8085#t8085) at the kink mime:
> 
>  
> 
> _When she flipped up the picture showing that she had to get the girl too, I could have squealed. So I'd like to see this happen in an actual job of hers, and then with her boasting to Eggs about it afterwards (maybe even in graphic detail just to tease him)._

After the seduction training mission turns traintrack interrogation, there isn’t much more said about the use of one’s charms while on the job. It’s not as if Eggsy expected every mission to end with him falling into bed with an undersexxed local, but those Bond films can’t have been baseless. All in all, there is as sad lack of all things sexual in his and Roxy’s missions.

 

Until all of a sudden there isn’t.

 

“Hold up,” Eggsy chimes in, waving a hand at Merlin. “Sexy older dame, begging for a night on the town to let loose, and you’re sending _Lancelot_?” 

 

“Ms. Pearsons much prefers the fairer sex,” Merlin says with a slight grin.

 

“Ain’t fair at all if you ask me,” Eggsy mumbles as he nudges Roxy with his shoulder.

 

“Such a shame,” the tiny blonde tells him, smirking as she continues, “I was planning on sharing all the sordid details once I came back.”

 

“You don’t have the stones,” Eggsy dares her, but he’s met only with an exaggerated wink as Lancelot takes her briefing and all but slinks out of the room. He looks at Merlin, who is busy studying the wall, and follows her with a sigh.

 

\--

 

Turns out Lancelot totally has the stones for it.

 

“Girls claim there’s nothing like a older man to show them the way around a bedroom, but _fuck_ ,” Roxy moans as she slides into the chair across from Eggsy. He blinks owlishly at her, but reaches out to accept the mug of earl gray she pushes towards him.

 

“Fun night then,” he asks, expecting that to be the end of it.

 

“I had so much fun that I almost felt bad stealing from her,” Roxy says, laughing brightly. “Poor thing was so high strung, it’s no wonder she’s lost control of her empire. I mean, God and country above all else, but she has the nicest set of tits I’ve held in a very long time.”

 

Eggys spits a mouthful onto the table, coughing as she just grins at him. 

 

“Soft, you know? But just the right side of heavy in my hands Obviously she’s had some work done, but it didn’t even matter. And the noises she made for me! I got her off twice with just my mouth on her nipples. Fuck, Eggsy, I wish you could have heard her,” she trails off with a sigh and looks down at her mobile. “Merlin wants me in five. We’ll catch up later!”

 

Eggys sits there half-hard for way too long before he realizes he has somewhere to be, too.

 

\--

 

And it just doesn’t stop.

 

Eggsy is used to this sort of bragging from boys down at the pub, but he’s never seen a lady get off on rehashing her exploits quit like Roxy seems to. He has to keep them separate in his head: Roxy and Lancelot. Because Lancelot is all posh and proper with a slight fetish for tweed. Roxy is apparently a sex addict with a downright filthy mouth and wicked eyes.

 

\--

 

“Oh come on now,” Eggsy whines when Lancelot is once again chosen for the honeypot scheme. “This one’s proper bloke and everything. Let me have crack at it for once.”

 

“A distinguished gentleman and straighter than an arrow,” Merlin tells him with a shrug. Eggsy would roll his eyes, but that’s a bit too un-Kingsmanlike for him nowadays.

 

“Older men are like a nice soak in a bubble bath,” Roxy says cheerfully. Both men look at her expectantly and she laughs softly. “They can be warm and soothing and just what’s called for at the end of a long day, but they make you hot and wet and can last forever,” she adds. Eggsy shakes his head as she leaves, looking a bit too chipper heading into what may become an assassination.

 

\--

 

In the end, Roxy gets her rocks off and Lancelot gets her shot off.

 

\--

 

“You may have bummed a princess, but I spent the weekend riding a popstar’s face,” Roxy tells him one Monday morning. He’s used to it by now and simply gestures for her to continue. “Turns out that mad Czech that Percival has been following around Prague has his hands in the record business.”

 

“Much like you’ve had your hands in his star?” Eggsy asks, snorting when she playfully shoves at him.

 

“My hands, my face, my tongue,” she sighs out. “It’s too bad the press won’t be privy to that info. Little thing screamed so loud that I worried the hotel staff might come running. And the mouth on her, shit I could write sonnets about it. Soft and sweet one moment and rough in all the right places the next. I have a lovely set of teeth marks on my left thigh. I do like my ladies on the _fancy_ side.”

 

Eggsy hates her. He really does. Only...she’s also the severely perverted older sister he never had.

 

\--

 

“I knew I could slip the cuffs at any moment, but it honestly felt good to let someone else take over for awhile,” Roxy admits over lunch. She stabs her salad a bit too enthusiastically before continuing. “I mean, being taken care of is just as lovely, but I can still feel his excitement in my wrist bones. It’s a shame that I don’t bruise easily. I wouldn’t have minded a bit of a reminder from this one.”

 

“Does it ever bother you? All the honeypots they send you out for?” Eggsy asks, tilting his head to study her. 

 

“I think of it as another tool in my arsenal,” she admits. “If the mission calls for it, why not take the easy path? I can take my mark down bit by bit in an interrogation room, or I can break them quicker and have a bit of fun on the side. Our job doesn’t leave much room for dating, does it?”

 

“Please don’t hit me when I say you think like a man,” Eggsy tells her. He winces when she jabs him quick and hard in the ribs.

 

“I think like a lady,” Lancelot says, narrowing her eyes as he grins at her. “Don’t ever start to think that men have cornered the market on being crass.”

 

“With your mouth? I’ll never forget it!” He ducks the next punch, and finishes his lunch while listening to her ramble on and on about mariners and their expertise in knotwork.

 

\--

 

“Let me guess, you spent the weekend pegging some American movie star in some swanky hotel room?” Eggsy asks by way of greeting.

 

“Actually, I my mother and I spent the last two days soaking up serenity at a charming bed and breakfast outside the city,” Lancelot counters. She does look fairly relaxed, so Eggsy shrugs and rolls into a story about JB taking on a massive black lab at the dog park.

 

\--

 

“Ate her out so long my tongue nearly gave out!” Roxy squealed as she slammed her hand on his shoulder. “Christ, she fell apart so beautifully for me. All trembling thighs and loads of slick. My glasses were covered in her by the end of it!”

 

“Your _glasses_?” Eggsy asked, his voice cracking slightly.

 

“Of course. I have to properly document the mission. How else is Merlin going to entertain himself?” she asks, giggling far too easily for Eggsy’s liking. Only she stutters when the man actually walks into his office and can’t quite meet his eyes. 

 

Merlin is just as bad off as Lancelot is, a perpetual frown on his face as they debrief the mission. It doesn’t take a super spy to figure out what Roxy’s game-plan is here, and Eggsy does her a favor by locking them in the room on his way out the door.

 

Being a wingman for friends of either gender is something a true gentleman always handles smoothly.


End file.
